We Can't Handle Cold Weather
By: Angelique Nguyen
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it a thousand times again: We, as Californians, are a weak species. There’s no denying this truth.
Of my eighteen yeas as a native Californian,I can attest to the fact that we really only have two seasons - normal, and inconvenient-extra-layer-of-jacket normal. Any variance beyond this norm is (to quite my good friend) biological warfare. Even just a degree or two slightly below the air-controlled temperature can be labelled as a direct attack against us, I wouldn’t wish tis upon any of my fellow Californian counterparts - the sheer cruelty!
Regarding the recent weather thatSouthern California has seen with record low temperatures this past February, it’s been quite an experience. I, myself, struggle when predicting the optimal articles of clothing to choose for the day.
There’s not much to do except scrutinize your wardrobe during these harrowing times, quizzically pondering if a dusty Christmas sweater or your bright pink ski jacket from the fourth grade (since diligently cropped, in true SoCal fashion) would better suffice. This, by the way, is being a little too generous. I wish that I could lie and say that I haven’t seen people wear flip-flops and shorts in the rain, but at this point, I’ve come to accept it. We, as a state, genuinely do not know what to do in minimally cold weather.
But hey, it’s tough to afford clothes for these bizarre weather-associated occasions when pilates classes and your third refill of pressed kale juice are just so much more expensive. This is the unequal standard we are expected to uphold compared to other states; our lush privileged lives come at no small cost - that being survivability, of course.
As for my thoughts on reaping benefits of simply existing where I do, in general, it’s been pretty nice. Snow is my actual kryptonite; I haven’t been to the mountains since I was a kid and got scarred forever when my hand turned blue. Rain is also wildly inconvenient for someone who only has semi waterproof combat boots and walks home. Really, I’ve been through some unthinkable things this yer especially.
Still. I’m faithful that we will survive this onslaught of cold. We may be a weak species, but we are a resilient one. Together , we emerge into spring stronger than ever, ready to take on anything, Including seceding from the country once and for all.